Kind or Blind?

You know you’ve had enough when things that were of huge importance to you suddenly seem meaningless, like you can live without them and their presence or lack of makes no difference.

You don’t care whatever happens anymore.

People can talk about you and it’ll just be like the droning voice of the news reporter talking about deaths and bombings that you’re so accustomed to hearing about.

People can say to your face what they think and momentarily you might get affected but you easily wipe the memory of them out the next day.

You’ve had enough when you know your words won’t have any effect anymore because you’ve spoken countless times and you might as well have spoken to a turtle or a hog.

The time to be hurt is over, how many times did you stand up for yourself and spell out loud and clear that you deserved better? that you at least wanted the kindness you so willingly bestowed upon them?

how many times did you fall asleep drenching your feathery pillow and wishing you could materialize in a time and place where no one you knew existed?

Your problem is you cared too much.

You loved too much.

You sacrificed much too.

You expected all that in return.

But the caring nature isn’t instilled in everyone.

Not everyone has the gift of exchanging positions, placing themselves in your shoes.

Most people do not want to think, do not want to burden themselves with feeling your pain.

You are alone.

Once you realize this, you grasp the reality of your situation by its antlers and gradually learn to say no.

You become meaner, you become a lover of yourself.

You guard your feelings and shut out people who attempt to step on your feet with their inconsideration and demeaning harshness.

You hurt people back when they hurt you.

You get rude, you curse, you scream.

You draw walls around you and draw down your iron gates,

and you stand watch at your tower,

guarding and sniping down anyone who seems like a threat to your stronghold.

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25 thoughts on “Kind or Blind?

  1. chrisbrittany Aug 25, 2018 — 10:43

    I have been in this situation many a times but I never had the guts to say a “No” 😐

    Liked by 4 people

    1. to say no the first time is an extremely difficult task, but then it gets easier after that. I’m not saying I say no to everyone, just the ones who act sefishly towards me.

      Liked by 3 people

  2. Though I wish to shout back and seem meaner , I don’t do it ! May be it’s just because I want to maintain a good relationship with others by suppressing my anger πŸ™„
    But seriously ,never have I had such guts to shout back πŸ™ƒ.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. chrisbrittany Aug 25, 2018 — 10:57

      Kiddo ! I know you since you were a kid . And yes I have never seen you getting angry . But have you noticed that people that advantage of this ? They take you for granted , I have seen it my

      Liked by 3 people

    2. chrisbrittany Aug 25, 2018 — 11:01

      I have seen it myself . But atleast you can tell people that you are hurt without seeming meaner. I totally agree that you are a person who never gets angry but when you are being taken as granted , this becomes your weakness dear . You should stand up for yourself at times . Hope you understand 😢

      Liked by 4 people

    3. Well sriharshinee you seem to value people around you the most . But as Chris Brittany said you must stand up for yourself at times . May be atleast after that you may live in peace . Because only when you tell others that you are hurt ,they will actually know .

      Liked by 3 people

    4. It’s good to see people helping out each other here in this blog.
      Keep going guys πŸ˜ƒ

      Liked by 4 people

    5. Omg! I never thought so many of you will respond πŸ™Š .
      Thank you for the love ❀

      Liked by 2 people

      1. It took me years and years: seven to be exact, of being taken advantage of and abusing my goodness to finally snap. I am not exactly mean to everyone, and I still give people chances, just have become very careful and less likey to say yes to everything. I love me more now. ☺️

        Liked by 3 people

      2. Yeah ! I understand πŸ€—

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Those of us who have a soft heart will always be this way, sadly.

        Liked by 2 people

      4. πŸ˜…πŸ˜… Yeah

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Nicely written Zena πŸ‘Œ

    Liked by 2 people

    1. thank you ❀️❀️

      Like

  4. This is so well penned ❀

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Glad it came out well 😊

      Like

  5. Ok. Yes. Right now? This. It fucking hurts. I want to crawl away into myself.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m sorry it had this effect on you. But I would want you to know you aren’t the only one who feels this way.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Nah it’s all good. It just happened to pop up on my reader just as I was feeling stuff. Hah! So yeah. That’s why we have poetry and art, and why we share it. It speaks to those parts of us that do feel alone.. πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

      2. well said. I wish you well in all your times as hard life may get, we all are here to support each other in the way of writing about our shared feelings.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Thank you Zena! You know.. I’m… super annoying and fast. I had my cry and now I’m on my way again. LOL. But thank you for sharing your writing. It’s so lovely. I shared one of your thingys on my blog, about being a writer.

        Like

      4. 😊😊 well what can I say, firstly, thanks for sharing something I wrote. Second, having a good cry is the best kind of healing where you don’t depend on anyone but yourself. It means you are strong. I know that because I have had my fair share of good cries too. lol.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. It took me awhile to start treating people how they treat me and I still don’t all the way honestly. I have learned though if I don’t toughen up I will get walked on.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It seems we have hit the same phase, we both. I also have decided that I need to be a bit more tough in people who aren’t kind or honest to me. I’m still working on being that person though.

      Liked by 1 person

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